Day Five of Thirty One Days of Writing

Q: How do you respond to change?

A: Not all that well. Here's the thing I like routine and when someone comes and pisses all over said schedule it pisses me off. I work really hard to keep everything in order and the smallest disruption can cause an outburst of epic proportions. It's not something I'm necessarily proud of but there's just no denying the fact I'm somewhat of a bossy pants. We can blame it on being the oldest sibling, it is what it is and this is my lot in life. PS-Don't tell me you haven't told someone what to do (and liked it)! PPS-I sort of like things how I like them and should probably work on being more flexible

The Thing About Change 

1. Change brings gifts. 

Change always comes bearing gifts. ~Price Pritchett

2. Change brings authenticity. 

We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves. ~Lynn Hall

3. Change brings second chances. 

We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance. ~Harrison Ford

 

Day Four of Thirty One Days of Writing

Q: What would you include in a truly epic gift basket? 

A: Adventure is the first thing that comes to mind when I think epic. I might not come off as the adventurous type but underneath the surface is a girl who just wants to have fun. The kind of fun that gets your heartbeat up or has you gazing at the stars. 

The adventures I'm up for experiencing since I know you wanna know: 

-glamping
-fly fishing

-white water rafting 

-skydiving
-topless beach (I'm not sure I want to be subjected to seeing other people's asses or junk. Just keeping it real y'all.)

I Hate Your Facebook Relationship

I know that hate is a strong word but it truly is the most appropriate way to express my feelings. The way I see it is sometimes there are going to be things that you hate. The same goes for people and in that instance you take the lessons learned with you, leave them behind and seek your revenge by being the happiest best looking you, you can be. Looking good is and always will be the best revenge!

But let's get back to the hate. When it comes to social media you will inevitably have moments when you're left scratching your head & think, "did so and so really just say that???" You mean they actually typed this & hit post. Then you'll be left to ponder if this person is in possession of a filter, if it's broken or perhaps been placed in the lost & found bin never to be seen again.

The First Facebook Relationship Status I Hate...

Is when you post a lovey dovey status update about your significant other and that person just so happens to be sitting next to you on the couch, I hate you. Here's an idea pause the tv (or wait for a commercial break), tap them on the shoulder and tell them. It is beyond me why people find it necessary to hit us over the head with "their love." Its yours. I know I sound like a lonely spinster but believe it or not I'm happy for your love,  but you don't hear me shouting it from the rooftops. Why? Because I'd look like a dumbass. Which is exactly what you look like only no one you know is going to tell you. 

I Hate This Status Too, Like A Lot...

If you are currently on an emotional rollercoaster with your significant other keep that shit to yourself. I get it, relationships aren't always easy & the person you love isn't always lovable. I'm sorry but if this describes your relationship you've got to keep your mouth shut.  I know how hard that is. No really, I just wrote about it & sometimes being a passive aggressive bitch just comes easier, I get it. Here's a secret there's power in silence. The first person you should give the silent treatment is the person who's treating you subpar & then do the rest of us a favor and give us the cold shoulder too. 

You look like an idiot when one day you're in love & the next you aren't. We are all starring into a screen and silently judging you. We're a little curious as to why you can't kick him to the curb. It's a few minutes of entertainment at the expense of your heart and that's  not fair to you. If he's an ass dump him, get fine, find a new man (who treats you better) and throw it in his face. Done and done.

I Hate This Status the MOST ...

There's nothing worse then referring to the person you're "sorta with" undercover. For example: "This weekend was amazing. I can't believe this is happening. You're the best!" The whole you know who you are post doesn't work because the rest of us don't know who you're talking about & news flash we want to. People update their Facebook status for a response and/or likes and there is no way in hell I'm clicking like on posts like this. Use better judgement by doing one of the following: 

A. If you aren't officially "together together" than wait until you are so you can use his freaking name without giving him a heart attack. 

B. If it's new and you aren't really wanting the whole judgy part that comes along with "publicly claiming" a person don't do it all. 

C. Tell him directly on the phone (you know it makes calls, right?), send him a text, email or be really forward and tell him the next time you see him.
                             

Day Three of Thirty One Days of Writing

Q: Have you ever traveled to a foreign country? What country would you most like to visit?

A: No, I've not had the pleasure of traveling internationally. The country I'd most like to pay a visit is a no brainer, it'd be France! I know that I want to go by myself & have a coming of age moment if you will. Is there an age limit on having such an experience? I know there better not be! So why France, well there's this fictional character who's love life mirrors my own from time to time, Carrie Bradshaw.  She dated this man, Alexander Petrovsky he was a rich, successful, older Russian artist. He asked her to leave the NYC behind and follow him to Paris although she knows he's self involved & has shown her on more than one occasion that he will never be able to fully commit, she goes. She loves him or at least thinks she does and who turns down Paris??? Not Carrie.

It's not long before she's lonely, depressed and confused. Raise your hand if you've been there too (just minus the being in Paris, right?). The worst part is when she runs into some fans at a bookstore who she plans to meet up with later that night, when Alexander turns into a selfish needy asshole. He's nervous about his opening and guilt's Carrie into coming with him & upon their arrival leaves her high and dry, much like he's done before. They argue, he slaps her, she leaves him only to run into Big & we all know where this is going. 

All that to say I want to see the Eiffel Tower, eat my heart out & do as many things as can off of this list by Time, which covers everything from galleries to roof top bars.

Day Two of Thirty One Days of Writing

Q: Do you need solitude? 

A: The first thing I'm going to do is define solitude.

sol·i·tude 

\ˈsä-lə-ˌtüd, -ˌtyüd\

noun

the quality or state of being alone or remote from society 

Now that we've cleared that up I'm going to be honest and say solitude is something I struggle with. On one hand yes, I need solitude. Being a stay at home mom means that there is a mini me that requires constant care and attention. It's the single most exhausting experience of my day, everyday. It's long hours, little pay but the most loving relationship I've been in. Solitude in this area of my life I welcome & relish when the opportunity presents itself. 

But then there's that other hand, for fun let's say it's the left one since that's the hand a shiny piece of jewelry ends up on. If you catch my drift. Solitude as a single woman can be painfully lonesome. Having another person in the form of a man is something I want. Someone to do something with or even absolutely nothing with, I'm totally flexible here. The thing is I don't really welcome solitude in this respect, but what I'm realizing is that embracing it means putting my big girl panties on. Here's to figuring out how to do just that before I find myself in the arms of a man begging me to relish in him. 

XO, 

V.V. Browne 

Top 10 Dates in Atlanta

I'm so super proud of this post for some reason. It could be because this is basically the equivalent of a football players handbook for dates I want to be taken on. Which should make it easier for the next man seeking to take yours truly out, emphasis on should. Enjoy y'all!

The city I call home was once touted the number one city for singles! Can you say that about your city? If you aren’t a resident you’ve probably caught yourself trying to be cool and said “HOT-lanta.” Newsflash: it’s not cool but it’s catchy, I’ll give you that. Atlanta is a city full of rich history, southern charm and although not reflected in reality shows like “Love & Hip Hop Atlanta,” “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” or “Married to Medicine” we’re a city of world class sophistication. If you’re looking to add a new spot to your date night rotation or just try something outside the box I’ve got you covered with my list of the Top 10 Dates in Atlanta for Singles Warehouse!


XO,


V.V. Browne

Day One of Thirty One Days of Writing

I'd love for you to follow along as I commit to writing daily over the next thirty one days! The questions were complied by the brains and beauty behind The SITS Girls. Who offer a wealth of blogging tips & info along with connecting us to each other on a variety of social media platforms. 

Q: What is something blogging has taught you about yourself?

A: Blogging about my dating life has taught me acceptance. Sometimes I'm a hot ass mess and there's something about writing about it that's help me to own it. Its one thing to "know" you have a pattern and it's another thing to KNOW you have a pattern. It's the latter that I picked up on as I read the stories I was telling. 

My type has always been an emotionally unavailable asshole with a sprinkling of selfishness. You see you can't possibly be a people pleaser and not attract those who are selfish. It's like you've got this flashing neon sign on your forehead that reads: I give too much please come and use me up. I was finally able to figure out the mistake I've been making all along which was prematurely making an emotional investment in men who had no intention of emotionally investing in me. Their called heart strings for a reason! People, in my case men have been able to pull or rather yank on them & turn me into an unrecognizable woman. 

I've cried, cursed, stormed & acted out more times then I'd like to count. All over men who didn't give two shits about me. Most of that has changed. I say most because even when we think we're doing our best and staying the course someone sneaks in and disrupts all of that. As I cleanse myself of sorts I see that it's been long overdue, letting go is really hard & although not knowing what the future holds is scary as hell it's also exciting! 

Like Dylan McDermott says in one of my favorite movies (also starring Debra Messing), the Wedding Date: 

Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you & the lucky bastards that get to meet you 

XO, 

V.V. Browne