Saturday, August 24, 2013

Today Love Can Kiss my Ass

I'm going to admit here and now that I could very well just be a menstruating crazy pants. Please tell me you put on your comfiest pair of crazy pants when it's that time of the month for you too? I started the day in an annoyed state and figured instead of putting my foot in my mouth I'd run. Albeit behind my usual schedule but if sleeping through ones alarm is a talent then I've mastered that. Oh and I might have put my foot in its most comfy position, by giving someone a small sampling of my wrath. A bit of truth mixed with some sarcasm and for his sake he's lucky that I let the endorphin's from my run do there job or shit would have got real.

I came across the photo to your left on Facebook. It was shot by my dream wedding photog, two (chics) photography. A little background, I found them at a bridal show I attended with the bestie. I am regularly bombarded with their amazing work on Facebook & today was no different. So what do you see first? I see an "older" couple which immediately sets in equal parts hope and fear. Hope that love happens at any age. I can't help but think how much harder dating as a single forty year old will be, one word: exponentially. Does the ageism shit work the same way for women it does for men? Like what's wrong with her. In forty years of walking the planet she couldn't find one bozo to marry her. On the bright side I did find one to knock me up but I don't know if that goes in the pro or con column. You'll have to tell me what you think. Oh, I don't like cats so I won't be the crazy cat lady. I do however like pigs. I only need one maybe two so they have each other for companionship purposes, while I browse and boom I'm the crazy pig lady. Not sure how that will go over with men but hey at forty who gives a damn, puh-lease!

I spent the day with my partner in crime at an amusement park. It's basically PDA overload. Hand holding, smooching & don't forget the giant stuff animals as a token of ones love and affection for the other. It was four hours of being reminded that I'm single. That this will not be the summer I sit on a bench and share a romantic moment eating funnel cake. Yes, eating funnel cake is extremely romantic. Just go with it, thank you. Want to know the best part of all? The person I was with wanted no part of holding my hand and wiped my kisses off. I still love her with all my heart though!

Last but certainly not least are all my married "friends." I use air quotes for two reasons, one because I love them and two because its more like perusing Facebook photo albums with titles like "The Happiest Day of my Life" *vomit* but still I look and think that will never be me. I should work on that, huh? The thinking not the looking. Some days to have and to hold is a little hard to choke down, like today for example. 

As I looked for a proper way to conclude I found a Facebook group entitled: Bacon-loving Hipsters can Kiss my Vegan ass. I love bacon. I love hipsters. End scene. It's Saturday night and there's a bottle of Pinot calling my name...

XO, Miss BB

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